This post was most recently updated on February 7th, 2022
Oh Pat&Archy, you have the lion’s share.
You’re playing footsie with the FTSE,
Stuffed shirts on all the boards you Chair.
Oh Pat, why are you so greedy and so fat?
Oh Archy, why must you always play the autocrat?
Dear Pat&Archy, why do you hate us so?
You rape and take, or turn away your eye,
Putting men above and women down below.
Dear Pat, why are you so violent and so vain?
Dear Archy, why does my loss mean your gain?
Oh Pat, you say my body’s not my own.
Archy makes the rules and laws,
Whilst Pat dictates that life begins when seed is sown.
When my very life and sanity is in danger,
Pat&Archy spread my legs for strangers.
Dearest Archy, would you treat your daughter thus?
Does your God decree that she must suffer?
Dearest Pat, together we must sit and discuss
How best we can live and love together
Without the female yoke and tether.
Oh Pat&Archy, why the misogyny and scorn?
Why must you take up all the space?
When all of us are of woman born
And none of this should be a race.
Treat us with dignity, listen to our pleas
We’re good for more than your striptease.
Wake up Archy and wake up Pat,
Let’s smash the big white-man fallacy.
You’ve tasted life with female doormats
Stop playing out this despotic fantasy.
Together as equals is the much better way
Over our bodies and babies we must have the say!